Secrets to Setting Yourself Up for Success in 2023 and Beyond

Secrets to Setting Yourself Up for Success in 2023 and Beyond

As 2022 closes out, it brings a time for reflection on all you learned and achieved. It’s a time to celebrate all your hard work and the positive impact you had on those around you!

And it’s also the best time to start looking ahead and planning out your successful year.

But what is success? And how do the world’s most successful people achieve it?

Over the past few years, I’ve been on a quest to understand what separates the best from the rest. I’ve listened to podcasts, read books, and scoured social media to uncover the secret of success.

All my research has helped me develop healthy habits across multiple areas of life. And it’s given me better results than I’ve ever had in the past.

Although everyone’s definition of success is slightly different, there are a few universal secrets to achieving it. Think of this post as your guide to the secrets of success to help you achieve big goals. 

If you’re looking for the most effective way to a more successful life, you’re in the right place! And if you’re pressed for time, click the link below to jump to the success secrets most relevant to your personal journey.

This post may contain affiliate links. As affiliates of the Amazon associate program, Modacity, Dr. Josh Wright ProPractice, Musicnotes, and Piano Marvel, I may receive a commission at no extra cost if you purchase through a link. Please see my full disclosure for further information and privacy policy. I take no credit for the images appearing on this page. All photos are courtesy of Canva.

What is your definition of success?

The first step is defining what success means for you. This will look different for everyone, so take some time to think about your goals and what you want out of life.

Do you want to launch your own business? Are you looking to become an expert in a specific skill? Or do you simply want to live a happy and fulfilled life?

Small steps add up quickly. Choose a couple of areas of your life to focus on at once. Focusing on more than a couple of goals at once can be overwhelming.

Use the following list to brainstorm possible goals across each of the following areas:

  • Family and relationships
  • Physical health and fitness
  • Spiritual
  • Career
  • Finances
  • Personal development
  • Hobbies and recreation

Go through your list and rate each goal according to importance. Think about which goals feel most aligned right now.

Select one or two goals and think about what successfully achieving that goal looks like. Does your definition of success mean working out 5 days a week? Or does it mean publishing 5 blog posts a month? It may mean committing to advancing your piano studies by signing up for an exam.

Once you have identified your definition of success, setting measurable goals and reaching them will become much more manageable.

How can you make the most out of this success guide?

Each of the secrets to success included in this post is highly effective. Use them to form an action plan for pushing out of your comfort zone and toward bigger and better things.

But you will find that some of the advice is more applicable to your individual goals than others. The best way to use this guide is to take what feels most aligned for you and leave the rest.

The most important thing is to start small and be specific. Write your goals down, set a timeline, and start taking action. Setting aside 10 minutes daily to work on your goal is a great start.

By setting goals and making little daily progress toward them, you’ll be setting yourself up for success in 2023 and beyond!

Secret #1: Mindset is Everything

One of my favorite quotes ever is by Henry Ford. His timeless advice is, “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”

Decades after Ford uttered those famous words, Carol Dweck published an entire book on the concept of a growth mindset. A growth mindset is an idea that our mindsets can be changed and adapted to new situations.

Having a growth mindset means you’re open to failure. It means you embrace rather than avoid challenges. And it means you’re willing to work harder than anyone else to achieve your goals.

In her book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Dweck contrasts the growth and fixed mindset. Through a series of stories and elements of research, she emphatically proves that with the right mindset, success is inevitable.

Setting yourself up for success means changing your beliefs about what’s possible and being open to learning the lessons failure teaches.

Change how you think and talk about yourself, and you’ll see dramatic improvements in your outlook on life. If you take only one thing from this post, I hope it’s a firm belief in the importance of a growth mindset.

Secret #2: Small Habits = Big Transformations

Small habits are the building blocks of success.

It’s easy to get excited about setting big goals and immediately jump into action, but frequently this leads to burnout. Instead, breaking down each goal into small achievable tasks that you can complete daily is a more effective strategy.

For example, if your goal is to write a book, setting a goal to write 500 words a day is more achievable than setting the goal of writing 1,000 words in one sitting.

Creating small habits will help you stay on track, and it also enables you to set realistic expectations for yourself. The key is finding manageable activities, so your daily progress adds up quickly and eventually leads to success.

In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear outlines the easiest ways to incorporate small changes that lead to big transformations in your daily life.

His advice has helped me find unique ways to fall in love with the daily habits needed to achieve my goals. The book has also helped me understand the impact environment has on whether you adopt positive habit changes or not.

And his thoughts on being 1% better every time are inspirational and approachable. Atomic Habits is a must-read for the new year if you haven’t read it.

Secret #3: Success Takes Longer Than You Think

Crossing the finish line of your goal will always take longer than expected.

And it’s so easy to get discouraged because everywhere you look, there are countless stories of overnight success and the promise of a silver bullet solution that will solve all your problems.

But all the best stories in books and movies involve the hero overcoming a seemingly insurmountable challenge. You get sucked into stories with obstacles at every turn, and failure seems inevitable.

The truth is, setting yourself up for success takes dedication and hard work. And the journey rarely looks like you thought it would.

My advice is to be patient and celebrate progress, no matter how small. One of the most profound ways to do this is by comparing your progress with where you started rather than your end goal.

It can be disheartening to think about where you are now compared to your ultimate goal. But it’s inspiring to consider how far you’ve come since your very first step.

Success isn’t a sprint; it’s a marathon that requires consistent effort over time.

Secret #4: Talent Has Limits

One of the most persistent myths out there is that of talent. There’s this assumption that people who are the best in their field are at the top because they were born with a specific skill set. And it’s this skill set that naturally puts them ahead of anyone else.

Anders Ericsson and Robert Pool explore one of the most famous examples in their book, Peak: Secrets from the New Science of Expertise. In the book, they dispel the persistent myth that Mozart was a child prodigy born with the gift of music.

The more likely explanation for his uncanny abilities was hours upon hours of practice. And through research study after study, Ericsson and Pool methodically dispel the idea that sheer talent has put anyone at the top of their game.

Instead, they focus on deliberate practice as the critical path toward greatness.

The idea that countless hours of deliberate practice will yield improvement in any skill may not seem motivational to some. But it’s one of the most hopeful ideas I’ve ever encountered.

It means that with the proper focus, you can succeed regardless of the roadblocks ahead.

Secret #5: Distraction is Expensive

One of the most challenging parts of setting yourself up for success is avoiding distractions.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the minutiae of daily life and let it derail your progress. But it’s important to remember that every moment you spend doing something other than what you should be focused on costs you valuable time, money, and energy.

The key to setting yourself up for success is staying focused on your goal, no matter how many obstacles come. The best way to do this is by setting boundaries around what you will and won’t focus on.

This could be setting specific times during the day dedicated to working on your goal, limiting how much time you can spend checking emails, or creating systems that help keep you focused.

No matter what your plan is, setting boundaries will give you the clarity and focus needed to stay on track and get closer to your goals.

And for the best advice on combatting distraction in your daily life, check out the book called Indistractable, written by Nir Eyal. It’s an eye-opening book on how distractions impact your ability to achieve goals and your overall life experience.

Secret #6: Failure is on Your Terms

Only you can define what success and failure mean to you.

Some of the most successful people in the world refuse to acknowledge failure as part of their vocabulary. When they don’t achieve the desired outcome, they assess the situation and make a calculated decision about their next best move.

Sometimes that means trying again. At other times it means pivoting to something different.

Either way, successful people don’t let the people around them define failure. They don’t listen to the chatter from those around them about their actions.

People who are successful write their own stories. And you can do the same by embracing the inevitable challenges between you and your goals.

If the goal you’re chasing means something to you and feels aligned, then embrace that you will get there slowly.

And if you’re looking for more success mindset advice, read Relentless: From Good to Great to Unstoppable by Tim Grover. Grover has worked with some of the world’s top athletes and is the expert on what it takes to be the best of the best.

Secret #7: Heal Your Past

Did you know that your brain loves patterns? Your brain is wired to look for patterns to minimize effort.

Although this can be a good thing when you’re practicing a new skill, it can be a massive detriment to your emotional well-being.

The reality is that most of us experienced trauma as children. This trauma occurred when we were not emotionally mature enough to process the world around us. And our brain coped by developing specific thought patterns to protect us from further trauma.

As a result, you have likely adopted maladaptive coping patterns, which can exacerbate anxiety and depression and cause self-sabotage.

To move forward, you need to unpack what happened in the past. And you need to start recognizing the role your maladaptive coping has on the challenges you’re currently facing in pursuing your goals.

Talking with a licensed counselor or mental health provider can be immensely helpful in making sense of your emotions and thought patterns.

Another resource that can help you unpack your past is a book by Dr. Nicole LePera called How to do the Work. I’ve read several books on learning to manage your internal world, and this is, by far, the absolute best.

Secret #8: Move Your Body

Physical activity is an absolute must when setting yourself up for success.

Regular exercise has been proven to reduce stress and improve your overall well-being, which in turn will help you stay focused on the task at hand. Exercise also helps increase energy levels, which can be incredibly beneficial if you work long hours.

Regular exercise improves your sleep at night. It also has the power to give you an immediate sense of accomplishment, which can be difficult when it seems as if your to-do list has no end.

Both of the above reasons are why I make it a point to make exercise part of my daily routine. It feels great to say that I conquered my workout, especially when my workday doesn’t go as expected.

But don’t feel like you have to go out and join a CrossFit gym! You can find enjoyable ways to move your body that fit your interests and lifestyle.

So whether it’s setting aside 15 minutes a day to do yoga, or taking regular walks with your dog, just focus on moving your body in some way every day.

Secret #9: Release Perfectionism

As a recovering perfectionist, one of my favorite mantras is “done is better than perfect.”

Believing that you can attain perfection in anything is one of the fastest ways to invite defeat into your life. And believing the myth of perfectionism is a downward spiral into low self-esteem and anxiety. It’s a path paved with procrastination and self-sabotage.

When you dig deeper into perfectionism, you often find an intense need to control situations and avoid failure. At its core, perfectionism is about the ego. It’s about appearances and what others think about you.

But you are the author of your story. You get to decide the meaning behind everything that happens to you, good or bad. And only you can define success and failure.

But you have to be fair to yourself. And chasing a vague and ever-rising bar isn’t fair to anyone, least of all yourself.

If you struggle with perfectionism, develop a new habit of being realistic with your goals. Make your goals measurable and attainable.

And once you accomplish them, celebrate!

If you’re serious about ridding yourself of perfectionism in the coming year, read The Pursuit of Perfect by Tal Ben-Shahar. It completely transformed my outlook and gave me a roadmap to living without the burden of perfectionism.

Secret #10: Get a Hobby

It may sound counterproductive, but having a stream of different hobbies is the reason for my success.

I’ve always been multi-passionate, and hobbies allow me to dabble in a little bit of everything.

Pursuing interests outside of work keeps your passion alive, especially when your work may be essential but less-than-thrilling. It gives you something to look forward to when things get tough. And it can teach you many lessons that would be otherwise difficult to learn.

Hobbies push you outside your comfort zone. They encourage you to approach the world with a beginner’s mindset. And they teach you that failure is the best opportunity to learn something new.

And, who knows? A hobby could turn into a side gig that eventually transitions into a full-time business.

So, find something you love and make time for it. Even if it’s just 30 minutes a day, it will pay off dividends in the long run.

Final Thoughts

Success is a personal definition. It’s something that looks a little different to each person.

But setting yourself up for success in the upcoming year and beyond requires setting boundaries and staying focused on your goal. It requires refusing to accept failure as part of your narrative and understanding that talent has its limits, but hard work pays off.

These are just a few secrets I’ve used to set myself up for success. What works for me may not work for you, so always take time to find what methods and approaches suit you the best. 

These secrets can be applied to any goal you set for yourself, and if used correctly, they will put you on the path toward success in 2023 and beyond.

This post was inspired by several great books that are required reading for anyone serious about setting themselves up for success. Clicking the convenient links below will take you directly to Amazon, where you can check these fantastic reads out for yourself.

And if this post inspired you, make sure to check out my other posts:

And if you’re looking for piano inspiration, check out these posts:

New Year’s Resolutions For Any Time of Year

New Year’s Resolutions For Any Time of Year

Can you believe that we are about to turn the calendar over to 2020 and are already talking about new year’s resolutions? I’m not sure about you but 2019 flew right by me! My 2019 was a year of both endings and new beginnings. It was the year that I finished the graduate nursing education journey I had started 3 years prior. But it was also the year that I said goodbye to a position with a company which felt like home.

Graduation meant taking a leap into an entirely new position within a completely different organization. An opportunity to embrace the change and grow in new and completely different ways than had ever been possible before. I am a firm believer that life is about the journey and not the destination.

But the belief in the beauty of the journey rather than the destination has taken me years to embrace. I never fully understood the value of implementing the wisdom in living my life this way until recently.

The reality is that while facing the daily challenges of balancing family, work, and school, my mindset shifted. I began focusing on graduation and moving beyond the daily stress of class and meeting homework deadlines. The phrase, “when I’m done with school” constantly crossed my mind and lips. My mind began to focus on the utopian future which would suddenly descend upon me once I held the diploma in my hand.

I stopped looking for the joy in my daily life.

Past New Year’s Resolutions

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You’re probably wondering what all of this has to do with your 2020 new year’s resolutions. Let me explain.

Looking back over the past 5 years, how many new year’s resolutions have you kept? Following through with resolutions is incredibly difficult if your focus is on the destination instead of the journey.

It works like this. As the new year approaches, you begin thinking about how great life would be if you were 15 pounds lighter. You’d actually feel like exercising, it would be easier to make healthier food choices, and you’d look amazing in your clothes. You would be unstoppable!

January 1 rolls around and you hit the gym, make yourself a salad for lunch, and turn down dessert after supper. You and your new year’s resolutions are off to a great start! All you can think about is how great life is going to be in 15 pounds.

Two weeks later, you hit a wall. You’ve been battling a cold, mornings come way too early, and you are just worn out. You’re running late for work and decide to just hit the drive through instead of packing a lunch. Slowly but surely you slip into your old habits again.

Fueled by the frustration of drifting farther and farther from your health goals, the guilt and shame of failure sets in. You feel further than ever from that elusive 15 pounds and at this point, it might as well be 50 pounds. Focusing on the destination has delivered you to the place where you once again put your goals on the shelf until the calendar flips over a new year. And repeat.

A focus on the destination will fail every time because our goals are often too big to sustain us through the daily grind. Achieving any new goal requires change in mindset and routine. Changing these areas of your daily life to achieve the goal can often be the toughest part. It’s incredibly easy to slip back into your old ways when the work required to change feels harder than the pay-off of the end goal.

Focus on the Journey

But what happens when you flip the mindset and instead focus on the journey? What does focusing on the journey actually look like?

In terms of new year’s resolutions, focusing on the journey means breaking the larger resolution down into daily action steps. It then means adapting each action step into your life in a way which is both motivating and satisfying. And most importantly, it means giving yourself permission to fail occasionally but the grace to move beyond the temporary setback.

Yes … you read that correctly. Set yourself up for success by actively planning for and moving past moments of setback.

Let’s take a look at my previous example of losing 15 pounds. Focusing on the journey means breaking down the steps you will need to take to accomplish this goal. Maybe you decide to hit the gym 4 days a week, pack healthy lunches for work instead of eating out, and cut back on dessert 3 days a week. These are the daily action steps needed to get to your goal.

Now to find ways of making these daily action steps both satisfying and motivating.

Maybe you are challenged with having 5 books on your “must read” list and no time in which to read them. This is a perfect opportunity to reward yourself with gym time by downloading an audio book app and only listening while working out.

Or maybe you are highly motivated by statistics so you find an app which tracks your workouts. You can then derive satisfaction from seeing all the miles you’ve racked up since you started.

There are any number of ways to satisfy and motivate yourself to continue the small, daily tasks required to accomplish larger goals. It’s often a matter of figuring out what motivates you individually.

The last piece of making your new year’s resolution a permanent part of your life is planning for setbacks. Setbacks are inevitable. No matter how satisfying and motivating you make your daily action steps, life happens and there will be times you need to take a step back. Keeping a new year’s resolution is not about whether you screw up but rather what your next step is when you fall off the wagon.

Do you miss a day at the gym, immediately feel incredibly guilty, and then decide to double down by having cheat meals for the next 10 months? Or do you give yourself some grace for being human and get back on track the next day?

To accomplish huge goals, including new year’s resolutions, you must take a series of small, daily steps which inch you ever closer to where you want to be. There will be days when you are not able to take those steps. But make up for it by choosing to take steps at the very next opportunity.

Focusing on the journey means actively seeking out the joy in your daily life. Choose to live in the now instead of chasing after the imaginary paradise of the destination.

Enjoying the journey rather than continually chasing the destination gives you the opportunity to figure out where you’re headed and whether this is the journey you actually want to be on. It gives you the power to evaluate and adjust your course regardless of where you’re at in your journey. You can make positive changes regardless of whether it’s January 1st or October 10th. The power is in your hands.

And if you’re looking for ideas on where to begin, I’ve got you covered! Check out the list below for simple new year’s resolutions divided out by category.

Physical Health

Work out 3 days a week. If you’re looking for an activity tracking app, check out this one which motivated me to log almost 400 miles this year!

Replace your usual lunch with a salad 3 days a week. Make packing easier with this bowl designed for lunch on-the-go.

Drink more water. This water bottle takes the guess work out of incorporating drinking more into your already busy lifestyle.

Sign up for a fitness class with a friend to increase your accountability and to make the class more fun.

Reduce your daily sodium intake to decrease your blood pressure and your overall cardiovascular risk.

Cook at home instead of eating out so you can control what goes into your meals. Find a new crockpot recipe and tame the supper chaos!

Increase your daily step count by taking the stairs instead of the elevator and by replacing a work break with an outside walk. Doing so will not only provide instant health benefits but will make you more refreshed and efficient when you return to your desk.

Drink less soda. The caffeine in many types of soda can interrupt your sleep while the sugar adds empty calories that are often unnecessary.

Add fresh fruits and vegetables to your diet on a daily basis. Check out this cookbook for fresh recipe ideas.

Cut back on alcohol. Excessive intake can negatively impact the heart, brain, liver, and immune system.

Emotional Health

Schedule time every day to pursue a hobby or activity which you find meaningful.

Incorporate a simple meditation exercise into your daily routine. Check out this app which has helped me better understand my thinking patterns and reduced my anxiety and overwhelm.

Learn strategies of relaxation to improve your mood, sleep, and to reduce certain cardiovascular risks.

Release yourself from something which has been weighing you down. We often put too much pressure on ourselves in certain areas of life and this leads to anxiety, overwhelm, and a general state of unhappiness. If you are having difficulty letting go, seek out a counselor.

Laugh. Every single day.

Limit the time you spend on social media. Although it has its perks, too much social media can suck up your time and depress your mood.

Say no more often. If whatever you’re being asked to do doesn’t light you up with joy, do yourself a favor and politely decline.

Relationships

Prioritize date night with your significant other. Spending time alone together gives you the opportunity to connect in ways that our often busy lives do not provide.

Drop the mom guilt. Do the absolute best you can and don’t worry about the rest!

Spend the last 30 minutes before bed talking with your significant other instead of losing yourself on your phone or computer.

Family game night. Need I say more?

Commit to device-free dinner, even if it’s only one night a week.

Plan a lunch date. Connecting with your partner at an unexpected time of day can create connection and leave you feeling energized for the rest of the day.

Say “I love you” more often. It’s a simple act but is something which can easily be lost in the craziness of daily life.

Set aside regular time to spend with each of your children to plan an afternoon date or participate in a fun, creative activity.

Spend some time figuring out whether you and your partner are speaking the same language. Check out this book for help.

Consider the language you use to convey messages to your partner, especially during disagreements. Use of the words “always” and “never” generally cause defensive feelings, never a positive when trying to resolve a complex situation. Seek the help of a counselor if you feel issues are continually unresolved.

Faith

Read the Bible daily. Make reading even easier with this great app which also includes all types of reading plans.

Prioritize prayer. Try setting a daily phone timer to prompt you to include this vital activity into your life.

Incorporate gratitude by writing down something you are grateful for each day.

Attend weekly church services.

Join or start a Bible study. Fellowship with others strengthens your faith and is a source of support during both good and bad times.

Volunteer your time or talents to a cause you find meaningful.

Increase your charitable donations.

Finances

Pack your lunch instead of eating out. Meal prep like a pro with these awesome containers!

Clearly identify your financial goals. Do you have debt to pay off? Looking to increase your income this year? Student loan debt piling up? The act of writing down your goals solidifies and clarifies them, making it easier to hit your target.

Track your expenses for a month to determine whether your spending aligns with your priorities.

Pick up a side gig to create another income stream.

Set up or get serious about contributing to your retirement account.

Switch to brewing your favorite drink at home instead of hitting up the drive thru line.

Cut down on both your bill and mindless screen time by cancelling your cable services. Imagine the financial possibilities with an extra $150+ a month in your account!

Career

Eliminate distractions from your work day to improve productivity. Check out this life-changing book for more on how you can take action today.

Focus on improving your self-confidence.

Read a personal development book. Or you could even aim for one per month.

Further your education. Whether you attend a formalized program or individual classes, education is a valuable asset applicable in many areas of both life and work.

Attend local networking events to expand your professional circle.

Spend some time updating your LinkedIn profile.

Find a career mentor. My greatest mentor is someone who consistently motivates and inspires me to be a better nurse today than I was yesterday.

It’s Your Turn!

And there you have it … simple habits you can incorporate into your daily life to move the needle further toward living your best life. New year’s resolutions don’t need to be complicated and in fact, the simpler, the better. Whether it’s January 1st or November 17th, you can make small changes which will add up to a more fulfilled and purposeful life.

Please drop a comment below about your own positive changes as I’d love to cheer you on!